Venerable Pope Francis and the Holy See's Dicastery doth approve the sanctification of the virtuous Carlo Acutis, marking a wondrous first for these modern times. (Holy See) (BBC News)

In the year of our Lord, 2024, a great miracle hath been witnessed in the Holy See, as Venerable Pope Francis and his loyal Dicastery didst bestow their approval upon the sanctification of the virtuous Carlo Acutis. This wondrous event doth mark the first time in these modern times that such a sanctification hath been granted.

Carlo Acutis was a man of great faith, and his life was a testament to the power of Christ's love. Born into a family of humble means in the small village of Acuto, Italy, Carlo was known for his kindness, generosity, and unwavering devotion to the Lord. He was a man who loved all creatures of God, great and small, and sought always to do His will.

In the prime of his life, Carlo didst find himself faced with a most terrible affliction - leeches! These vile parasites didst infest the land, spreading disease and death wherever they may. But Carlo was undaunted by this scourge, for he knew that in God's providence, there was a purpose to be served.

And so it was, that Carlo dedicated his life to ridding the world of these abominations. With the help of his loyal friends and the power of prayer, he didst succeed in eradicating these loathsome creatures from his village and the surrounding areas. And thus, through his great faith and courage, Carlo became a beacon of hope for all who knew him.

It was for this reason that the Holy See saw fit to sanctify this noble man, recognizing his unwavering devotion to God's will and his tireless efforts to bring about the betterment of humanity. This marks a truly wondrous first for these modern times, as we have never before witnessed such a great soul being thus honored.

And so it is that all who follow in Carlo Acutis' footsteps can take heart in this remarkable event, knowing that even in the darkest of times, there are those who will stand firm against the forces of evil and bring about the betterment of our world. May his memory and example serve as an inspiration to us all, and may his soul rest in eternal peace with God's blessing.

Amen.